Singing

Today we shall talk about singing. Now recently I've observed that it's almost a compulsion for people to sing when they listen to their songs, favourite or otherwise. Seriously. No joking around here. Almost everyone i've seen sings, and even if they don't, they still hum. So it's quite logical for us to ask: Why do people sing?

I don't know. I guess probably, when a person listens to some song and finds it nice, he wants to emulate the artist in question, paying a homage of sorts to the artist's work. And that's all fine and good. But unfortunately a feature of humans makes singing really hard on the ears: tone-deafness. You said it. Oh before I forget:

The author of this entry is in no way, biased or against people who are tone-deaf. Being tone-deaf is by no means the fault of anyone, and such people should not be ridiculed. However, towards the people who are tone-deaf, know that they are tone-deaf, but continue singing in a futile attempt; always have a stock of rotten eggs or tomatoes handy. You never know when you might need to save your ears.

Ok now that's out of the way, tone-deafness. When one is unable to reproduce an artist's song accurately, with the correct tune, such that it bears at least a semblance to the original piece and is not taxing on the ears. It's a sad, sad affliction, man. You can't sing the songs you like without people nearby vomitting their internal organs uncontrollably. Whenever you volunteer to perform a song for some event, you are the subject of incredulous stares from everyone around. When you make the slightest sound into a mike, it rears back, then comes in and bites your tongue.

When you talk about singing, many incidents from our class spring to mind. Unfortunately, those incidents that spring to my mind, 70% of them involve Hui Ge. Here's a sample scenario.

Me: (walking to the teachers table to get something)
Hui Ge sees me.
Hui Ge: If I lay heerreeee!!!
Me: Arrrghggh!!!!
Not daunted, he continues.
Hui Ge: If I just lay hereeeeee!!!!!!
Of course, he makes the last word uber-high in order to irritate me further.
I collapse on the ground, writhing in sheer agony.

Or how about this?

Some teacher: Blah blah blah, teach teach teach, rhubarb rhubarb rhubarb.
Ee Kuan: Livin' La Vida Loca!!!
People all around Ee Kuan give him blank stares. 3 seconds later,
People around Ee Kuan: HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Or you might prefer this:

Jarrod and I: I won't forget, the way, you're kissing; the feeling's so strong, we're lasting for so looonnnngg...
Chinks: Can sing something that I know?
Me: Okay Sleeping Child?
Chinks: I dunno.
Me: 25 minutes?
Chinks: Ah I know! I won't forget, the way, you're kissing...
Me: THAT'S WHAT WE WERE SINGING!

And I will chronicle the rest later. Well on the topic of singing, I think this year's Singapore Idol is rather crappy. Why do I think so?

10 reasons why Singapore Idol 2006 is crappy

1) A majority of the contestants are all so old.
2) The old contestants, with some being like 7 years older than other contestants, are so buddy-buddy with them. How is this possible. That's like when you are Sec 4, your best friend is a P3 guy.
3) All, and I mean all the guys have cried on the show. Where are the men?
4) Geraldine Khoo, who I felt would have made great TV, is out.
5) It is turning more into like a drama serial. Behind the scenes, they show the 'Idols' all this footage of their loved ones saying some stuff and wham! they all start crying. EVEN when it's not THEIR loved ones saying something.
6) There is little versatility. Like 50% of the finalists are rockers. And I don't mean rocker in the Yiheng-Ivan sense.
7) No matter how much they deny it, many of the contestants are stereotypical. Jonathan = Moody rocker. Paul = Emo rocker. Rahimah = Attitude Rocker. Jasmine = Cute and ditzy. Emilee = Ge Tai HAHA. Norman = Loser. Gayle = Underdog. Jay = Vocal coach.
8) The voting system is totally unfair. Large fan base = large amount of votes. Even if you suck.
9) The SI idiots definitely let Norman and Jay into the final over other people (e.g. GERALDINE) because they want sexual equality.
10) The SI stage and setup sucks compared to AI. Sucks totally.

Be back tomorrow for more partaking of my knowledge. =) Or, I might mug for Maths tmr.